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CHILD UPBRINGING/TARBIYA.FACE 2


As salaam alaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh
Complete Praises are surely Allah's, Blessings and Salutations upon the Noble Prophet Muhammad SAW,
May Allah bless members of His household, companions and those who have followed the right path till now. Aameen
AlhamduliLlah for a night once again where we aim at reminding ourselves with certain common issues of life as humans...
We pray & Hope every bit of it will be beneficial to us. Aameen
Some practical steps in bringing up the family correctly.
 
 Seeking Righteous Children
When an individual wants to get married, they should have the intention to have - and ask Allah to give them - righteous children. They should be patient upon this and seek their children with the correct intention i.e. to increase the number of the Prophet's Ummah, and seek Allah's reward in this life and the Hereafter by way of his children.
_As the Prophet said,_ " Marry those women who are loving and fertile, for verily I want to be amongst those (Prophets) who have the most followers on the Day of Judgement." So when a person gets married he should seek children with the intention to have many children which will go towards making up the Ummah of the Prophet and that these children may become righteous slaves of Allah so that he may benefit from them in this world and the Hereafter
May Allah SWT grant us righteous spouses and children
Aamin
May Allah SWT grant us righteous spouses and children.
the intention has a special and important place with regard to the outcome, as the Prophet said, "Verily, every action is by its intention." So if one has the correct intention at the beginning of the action, then he has its correct fruits at the end.
Correct intention correct fruits
 
Setting A Good Example
The parent should be a good and the best example for their children. They should hasten to do all good and, likewise, hasten to leave all evil. This is because children follow the example of their parents as they love them and respect and admire them. So the parents are the greatest of all examples for their children.
Therefore, whatever the parents are upon, the children follow them. It is not possible, however one may try, to hide one's evil characteristics from their children. A person may go into his home, closing the door behind them, but it is the children who know the reality of their affairs They know how their character truly is, what they watch and what they see, and they know their situation perfectly. So we should try and be good examples to our children; having the best characteristics, being good towards the people, and remaining  upright in our Deen.
 
Placing Importance Upon The Deen
The parent should make the most important affair in his life and that of his child the Religion. They should raise their child to know that the most important aspect of his life is that he be upright in his Deen, correcting it and clinging to it firmly. Allah said,
"And this submission to Allah, Islam) was enjoined by Ibrahem upon his sons and by Ya'qoob (as), ( saying), 'O my sons! Allah has chosen for you the (true) Religion, they die not except in the Faith of* Islam." [Qur'an Baqarah 2:132]
And He says, And he made it (i.e. Laa ilaha illAllah - none has the right to be worshipped but Allah Alone) a Word lasting among his offspring (True Monotheism), that they may turn back (i.e. repent to Allah or receive admonition)." [Qu r'an Zukhruf 43:28]
So this should be our greatest concern with regard to our children, that we make clear to them the importance of their Religion and their being upright. We should not be concerned with their Dunya i.e. that they bring home food or drink or wealth, rather we should be most concerned with their remaining upright Muslims.
🏻After this, the believer should make du'a to Allah and supplicate to Him that He guide his children and make them upright, for indeed there is no power nor strength except in Allah. No one has the ability to guide his children himself, or to keep them upon the straight path, rather this is in the Hands of Allah. So one should make du'a to Allah as His prophets did before. Allah says that the believers say,
🌸🌸🌸
" Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders for the Muttaqoon (i.e. pious and righteous persons who fear Allah much [abstain from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which He has forbidden] and love Allah much [perform all kinds of good deeds which He has ordained])." [Qur'an Furqan 25:74]


And also Prophet Ibrahem (as) _mentioned in a long_ _du'a_ ,

"O my Lord! Make me one who offers prayers perfectly, and (also) from my offspring, our Lord! And accept my invocation." [Qur'an Ibrahim 14:40]
So we should follow this example of the prophets in making du'a to Allah and taking the necessary steps in educating and bringing up our children upon this Deen, and asking Allah to keep them upright in their Religion. The Ayah which was previously mentioned is general for all of the believers.
That is, that when one reaches the age of 40 he should make du'a for his parents and that Allah should keep him upon the Guidance, and he also makes du'a that Allah keeps his children upright and correct their affairs.
Showing Love & Kindness Towards One's Children
The parent should control his affair with love, kindness and softness, and should not always use harshness and beating to bring up his children. Rather, he should make his way to be primarily a loving and concerned way. However, if the situation requires that he should also use harshness and hardness and even hitting his children, then he should do so as and when the situation requires it, but he should not make this his way i.e. that he is always hard and harsh towards his CHILDREN.
We should not be like those people who are always hard upon their children as this may lead them towards further corruption and going astray. Neither should we be like many of the Europeans are i.e. that they leave their children without any discipline so that they follow whatever way they like and do whatever they like. Rather we should take the middle course (balanced), sometimes using harshness and sometimes softness, according to the situation. We should always try to exercise balance in raising our children, balancing their affairs correctly and making the uppermost characteristic that of kindness, softness and MERCY.
Will pause here and continue other time if Allah SWT permits us.
WASOLLALLAAHU ALAA NABIYYINA WA ALAA AALIHI WA AS HAABIHI AJMAEEN.
WASALAAM ALAIKUM WARAHMATULLAH WABARAKATUH
 
 
 

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